when somebody makes a good greek mythology joke
Okay but imagine: Persephone making a flower crown for Hades and it’s his favorite thing ever and he wears it all the time and nobody would ever say anything bad about it because a.) are u really gonna insult the God of the underworld and b.) everyone in the underworld loves Perse she’s like the den...
- Zeus:im gonna put my dick in it
- Everyone:dont put ur dick in it
- Zeus:toO LaTE
Greek Mythology in 5 words
Unfortunately, Zeus was feeling horny.
Persephone is the goddess of flowers and is adorable and smart and she probably only wears pastels and at the same time she’s the queen of hell and if that’s not life goals I don’t know what is
- Ares:I’ve got an idea.
- Athena:We’re not going to murder anyone.
- Ares:I don’t have any ideas.
“it takes centuries, but the gods forget. hades has distant memories of the dark: he takes his home with him, huddling in blankets under wha...”
- aries:ares (determined, impulsive)
- taurus:hephaestus (kind, peaceful, has a jealous side)
- gemini:dionysus (fun, lighthearted, easily misunderstood)
- cancer:artemis (friendly, protective, sensitive)
- leo:zeus (regal, in control and strong)
- virgo:poseidon (noble, critical, and moody)
- libra:aphrodite (attractive without trying, has a seductive nature, vain)
- scorpio:hera (majestic, vindictive)
“I survived because the fire inside me was stronger than the fire around me.”
Alright Persephone, time with the hubbie is up get your ass out of the Underworld so we can have spring.
“Not all gods.”
“Nobody likes you.” You turn to look at Odysseus in surprise. He blushes and looks down. He nods. It’s true. Nobody does like you. You are Penelope.
greek mythology is all fun and games until someone has sex with zeus then shit goes down and hera comes up with her jealous ass ready to whoop some bitch