• Morty Smith •
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  • Aries:SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT MOON MEN!! This isn't a musical number! This is a fucking... operation, we gotta be cool and fucking lay low.
  • Taurus:Listen Morty, I hate to break it to you, but what people calls "love" is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. It hits hard, Morty, then it slowly fades, leaving you stranded in a failing marriage. I did it. Your parents are gonna do it. Break the cycle, Morty. Rise above. Focus on science.
  • Gemini:Don't be a baby! You avoid getting shot in real life all the time, Morty! Just do the same thing here and we'll be fine!
  • Cancer:The outside world is our enemy, Morty! We're the only fehh-friends we got, Morty! It's just Rick and Morty! Ruh-ick and Morty and their adventures, Morty! Rick and Morty forever and forever, 100 years, Rick and Morty's things! Me and Rick and Morty running around and... Rick and Morty time! All day long, forever... all- a hundred days! Rick and Morty forever a hundred times! Over and over, rickandmortyadventures.com. Www.rickandmorty.com. Www.rickandmortyadventures. All 100 years. Every minute, rickandmorty.com. [closing garage door inside] Www.100timesrickandmorty.com.
  • Leo:Whatever you're asking, the answer is I'm amazing. And away we go!
  • Virgo:Okay. 60 (burp) for the resonator, and my grandson wants the sex robot.
  • Libra:Morty, that's such a poor use of my time, it's beneath me. Hand me the screwdriver.
  • Scorpio:Right, yeah, like nothing shady ever happened in a fully furnished office? You ever hear about Wall Street, Morty? Y-Y-Y'know what those guys do i-in-in their fancy boardrooms? They take their balls and they dip 'em in cocaine and wipe 'em all over each other—y'know, Grandpa goes around and he does his business in public, because Grandpa isn't shady.
  • ...
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