“Know the difference between burning and shining for somebody. Setting yourself on fire isn’t the same as setting yourself alight.”
“My grandmother told me to never start my sentences with “I”. It makes you sound self-absorbed. I think I do it in spite of her. ...”
“she says to me: ‘if you want to hurt a man, you don’t kill the man. you kill what he loves.’ i nod. and then i ask her: ...”
My grandmother passed away when she was 91 years old; before she died I asked her for some life advice. This is what she told me: Exercise and lift weight while you still can. You will need the strength when you are old. Life is too short to not eat cake every day.
5 Important things my great grandmother has taught me
NOBODY should ever know ALL your business. Words is words and they only hold the power you give them. It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to. It’s okay to be cheap but, you get what you pay for. Keep your credit straight, it’s more important than money.
- Me:So sometimes I'm a boy, but sometimes I'm a girl.
- Grandma:I have enough idiot granddaughters already
- Grandma:But I also have enough idiot grandsons, so having an idiot who isn't really either one is kind of refreshing.
- *then later*
- My mom:Alex, can you come pick up these LEGOs?
- BFF:Grandmother I need to talk to you
- Grandma:[concerned voice] What? What is it? Are you sick?
- BFF:No, no. Grandma. I'm gay.
- BFF:I'm gay Grandma. I have a girlfriend now.
- Grandma:[relieved voice] Oh honey, is that all? I thought you had cancer. Anytime someone needs to tell me something they are sick. Who's your girlfriend, when is her birthday? I'll bake her a pie.
I've been told you'd like to hear about my Grandmother...
My grandmother got married in 1962, to a young man in the military. For a wedding present, their parents bought them a house in a nice suburb. White picket fence, whole 9 yards. Not long after they moved in, the next door neighbor planted a mullberry tree on the side of his property, near my grandpa...