Please stop you're scaring me: Taurus, Gemini, Virgo, Libra, Capricorn, Pisces
God damn right, you should be scared of me: Aries, Cancer, Leo, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Aquarius
Mercy: I'm being attacked!
Rest of team: ✓ Seen 3:48 PM
my parents before Pokemon GO: you never leave the house, you just sit in your room all day
my parents after Pokemon GO: where are you?? Please come home it's been two weeks
me @ me: just talk to them u guys are mutuals
also me @ me: BUT AM I MUTUAL ENOUGH????
Fan #1: That's a nice character. I wonder what they would be like if they lost everything that ever made them happy and also the world ended.
Fan #2: That's a nice character. I wonder what they're like with five different toys up their ass.
me: meh, today is okay
old friends senior dog sanctuary: leo is okay and he's coming home soon
me: today is the best day. no day is better than today.
Faerie Queen: And now that you have proven yourself in front of my entire court, saving my life and the lives of my gentry, I will grant you a boon. Ask any question, and you shall have your answer--even if I must take leave of my throne and quest to grant you satisfaction.
Me: Was My Immortal written as a joke or was the author serious??
Me: okay brain, don't freak out, but we've come across a minor inconvenience
My shit brain, dousing itself in gasoline: unfortunate,
Nick: I think it [Harry's hair] looks good.
Fiona: Yeah, but everything's gonna suit him.
Nick: That's true. It's the bone structure.
VIRGO, ARIES, Capricorn, Aquarius, Sagittarius, Leo.
Fans: We want bisexual Steve Rogers
Marvel: But nazi Captain America is what you're getting
current emotion: vague hand gestures
future plans: vague hand gestures
thoughts regarding a lot of things: vague hand gestures
Aries: “Perhaps when we find ourselves wanting everything, it is because we are dangerously near to wanting nothing.”
Taurus: “Would it be too childish of me to say: I want? But I do want: theater, light, color, paintings, wine and wonder.”
Gemini: “What is my life for and what am I going to do with it? I don’t know and I’m afraid. I can never read all the books I want; I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want.”
Cancer: “How we need another soul to cling to, another body to keep us warm. To rest and trust; to give your soul in confidence: I need this, I need someone to pour myself into.”
Leo: “Frustrated? Yes. Why? Because it is impossible for me to be God—”
Virgo: “What horrifies me most is the idea of being useless: well-educated, brilliantly promising, and fading out into an indifferent middle-age.”
Libra: “I love people. Everybody. I love them, I think, as a stamp collector loves his collection. Every story, every incident, every bit of conversation is raw material for me.”
Scorpio: “I’m dramatic and sloppily semi-cynical and semi-sentimental.” ...
daenerys: not raped in the books
cersei: not raped in the books
sansa: not raped in the books
GoT writers: how can we make these characters interesting and make it clear they're suffering?
GoT writers: i know
Trauma survivors on tv: (beautifully broken, delivers tearful speech on their traumas, hug it out)
Me: (describes abusive event and laughs) BOY THAT SURE WAS FUCKED UP
kylo: I'm being torn apart
Han Solo: (visibly struggling with a profound and painful conflict. he is silent for a long time, breathing audibly in the empty space. then the struggle is over, and he has lost to something he hates in himself, something stronger than his will. he speaks.) hi being torn apart
Han Solo: I'm dad
harry: can i please get a semi-iced half caramel half vanilla decaf latte with no foam using fresh almond milk with a small swirl of whipped cream covered in a pinch of cinnamon and a fresh cherry?
louis: ...no? what the fuck
Leading skincare experts: hot water is actually bad for your skin jsyk
Me: that's unfortunate *continues to boil my flesh in the shower*