• Living a good life is like having Stockholm Syndrome. You don’t choose life but you come to en... thoughts from the shower showerthoughts water based introspection showery contemplation just-shower-thoughts •

Living a good life is like having Stockholm Syndrome. You don’t choose life but you come to enjoy it.


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2149 notes / 4 years 4 months ago
Blank pages with “This page intentionally left blank” printed on them aren’t blank at all.
Going to prison for attempted murder is going to prison for failure.
If a girl likes water she already likes 75% of me
If you give a man a cigarette, he’ll smoke for ten minutes. If you light him on fire, he’ll smoke for the rest of his life.
Everytime you get dressed remember that, if you die, that’s your ghost outfit forever.
The side effects list for sleep medication essentially say, “We’ll put you to sleep, but we can’t guarantee you’ll wake up.”
Facebook is like our real life Pokédex for people.
The moral of Rudolph the Red nose reindeer is that no one likes you unless you’re useful.
Walking into a glass door is the best complement a window washer can get.
White trash is such a hateful phrase. I prefer the term “caucasian non-recyclables”
Star Wars and Metallica fans are the same: die hard fans that never stop talking about their first three albums, have been disappointed with everything since then and are always hopeful the next release will redeem them.
What America thinks of Texas is what the world thinks of America.