- Aries Expectation:Fierce ram, will fuck u up, is hella brave
- Aries Reality:Is a sheep with oversized horns and was bullied and is trying to overcompensate
- Taurus Expectation:Loyal bull
- Taurus Reality:Cow that is too lazy to betray you
- Gemini Expectation:Super smart, super intelligent, can and will slay you.
- Gemini Reality:Has abandonment issues and an identity crisis every month
- Cancer Expectation:Mother bear and reliable and strong
- Cancer Reality:Emotional wreck
“Aries — ripping off the band-aid, waking through a forest, being center stage, police sirens, fingernails tapping against a desk, boil...”
the "god/goddess" squad
Capricorn, Taurus, Aries, Libra, Cancer, Virgo
- scary but cute:scorpio, cancer, aries
- nice but rude:leo, libra, gemini
- blunt but shady:sagittarius, aquarius, scorpio
- weird but cool:virgo, pisces, capricorn
- confident but insecure:gemini, leo, capricorn
- friendly but shy:taurus, virgo, cancer
- awkward but smooth:leo, aquarius, aries
- honest but reserved:scorpio, libra, pisces
- rad but sad:taurus, aries, gemini, cancer
- has probably killed a man already:leo, scorpio, virgo, aquarius,
- looks like they should be wearing a flower crown but would probably cut a bitch:cancer, leo, sagittarius,
- precious cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure:libra, pisces,
- Gemini:New friendship
- Cancer:Self confidence
- Libra:Inner peace
- Scorpio:DEATH AND DESTRUCTION OF ALL YOU HOLD DEAR. THE SWALLOWING OF THE SUN BY AN ANCIENT HUNGRY GOD AND A SKY AS BLACK AS YOUR SOUL, SCORPIO. THERE IS NO ESCAPE FROM THE ABYSS
the "accidental five hour nap" squad
taurus, cancer, libra, pisces, leo, scorpio
How the signs respond to “I love you”
Aries- I love you MORE Taurus- …really? Gemini- I love… cake. Cancer- for how long? Leo- Well, why wouldn’t you? Virgo- Thank you Libra- I have to pee. Scorpio- Mhm Sagittarius- No, I love YOUUUUU Capricorn- I know. Aquarius- What even is love? Pisces- Huh?
- Aries:Swimming pools, cold drinks in the summer. Hazy orange-yellow sunsets, passionate kisses. Hair touching, long car rides with friends, watching the sunrise. Long naps, yelling along to music.
- Taurus:Secluded forests, slight breezes that sway tall grass. Long, meaningful text messages, chipped nail polish, the smell of the ocean. Having the music at full volume and drowning out the rest of the world.
- Gemini:Long car rides alone, windows down, loud music. Poetry, typewriter clicks. Laughing so hard your stomach hurts. The color black and navy blue, the smell after the rain. Existentialism, looking at stars.
- Cancer:Long, warm hugs. Hand holding, kept secrets and light-hearted jokes. The color blue, dogs, wild flowers that grow in your backyard. The smell of new books, and the sound of an old piano.
- Leo:Clean sheets, sleeping in late. Sunlight pouring into your room. Stretching, the smell of chocolate chip pancakes. CD's and clothes everywhere, intimacy. Bonfires, exotic beaches, and slightly out-of-tune guitars.
- Virgo:Freckles, musical theatre, live performances. Harmonic singing, late night phone calls. Raspy morning voices, vanilla, and running until you're out of breath. Art museums, dancing, dark circles under your eyes. Foreign countries and languages, dogs.
- Libra:Smiling between kisses, art galleries, paint-stained clothing. The sound of the harp. Graphite, the smell of coffee. Kept promises, swimming, and colliding hugs. Intertwined fingers, cats, crying, and the smell of burning wood in the wintertime.
- Scorpio:Comfortable silence, nature, relaxation, being home. Thinking, being with family, the color green. Intelligence, old books, and the calming hum of a car engine. Camping, imperturbability.
The actual zodiac signs
Aries: really fucking arrogant Taurus: bossy as fuck Gemini: two-faced spawn of satan Cancer: kinda nice and cries a lot Leo: talks way too much Virgo: overanalyzes everything Libra: probably hella boring Scorpio: has a collection of knives Sagittarius: keep your opinions to yourself Capricorn: luci...
the “i dont want to ask for help even though i desperately need it” squad
aries, taurus, gemini, leo, virgo, scorpio, sagittarius
The ‘Super Hot And Extremely Smart‘ Squad
Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Sagittarius, Capricorn, and Aquarius
The signs and their sleeping hours
9-12+ hours: Taurus, Pisces, Leo 5-8 hours: Scorpio, Capricorn, Libra1-4 hours: Virgo, Aquarius, GeminiAll nighters: Sagittarius, Aries, Cancer
aries: knitted scarves, red lipstick, fairy lights, lemongrass, old books, balloons, minimalism taurus: mist rising in the sky, wanderlust, architecture, collared shirts, cherry blossoms gemini: random words in foreign languages, existential quotes, black, succulents cancer: ms paint, paper lant...
“ARIES you’re brave and insightful and rash no one can take that away from you they don’t have the right and they never will TAURUS you’ll...”
- bullshit an essay in a day but can't do maths:taurus, cancer, leo, libra, sagittarius, pisces
- do maths problems in 5 mins, but can't write an essay for shit:aries, gemini, virgo, scorpio, capricorn, aquarius
Signs as Bad Bitches
Looks like a bad bitch but is a softy: Leo, Gemini, Pisces, SagittariusLooks like a softy but is a bad bitch: Aquarius, Taurus, Cancer, LibraLooks like a bad bitch is a bad bitch: Virgo, Scorpio, Aries, Capricorn