I play the Sims to escape reality and live impossible fantasies—like having a house and job.
I always forget the existence of pears until I see or hear one getting mentioned.
In the 90s, kids went outside to play. In the 2000s, kids stayed inside to play video games. As of last week, kids go outside to play video games.
So Pokemon Go came out and I legit walked around for three hours in the dark, met like five of my neighbors also looking for Pokemon, and saw a grown ass man trudge into a pond. What a time to be alive.
You could punch a random British person in the face today and there’s a 52% chance they’d deserve it.
Woth great britain leaving, Europe has some free space. Exactly 1 GB.
all flashlights should have a glow-in-the-dark band on them so you can find them when you need a flashlight
I wonder what people who write “u” and “ur” do with all their extra time.
If you’re pregnant with a boy, you’re growing a pair of balls
I will never become one of those old people who can’t drive. Because, by the time I’m old, cars will drive themselves.
Am I the only one who feels like something is in the tip of my finger after copying till I get to where I paste it?
“DO NOT TOUCH” has got to be one of the scariest things to read in braille